spandexisyouth | Twenty-sixth Lotus

You know I think you are hot because I felt your forehead and told you that you were too hot. It did not sound like you were talking to me. It sounded like you were in one-sided conversation with the door.

You are not fine and you are resting and if I have to make you rest I will.

That wasn't the "hot" I [The pen drags a little, tiredly] Forget it.
The door's a better conversationalist than you anyway.

Ok. Make me.

See? I missed teasing and you did not have the energy to keep teasing. You are too ill.

It is not! It is a door! Doors cannot talk or have conversations!

I could tie you up. Or I could sit on you. Or I could leave my weights on you. Please rest?

I just didn't care. It just wasn't worth it.

You're just jealous.

Yeah yeah. Later.

[Excuse me whilst I get up, wrapped in blankets, and go to make tea. Totally not sick.]

[Slowly.] I wasn't worth it?

[Normal speed.] Of a door? I would not be jealous of a door! IT IS A DOOR.

[He catches sight of Bell coming out of the room and sighs. His voice is gentle, a rare sound.] No. Now.

[Getting up, Youth intercepted Bell and put the kettle on the stove.] Go rest, please.

Whatever.

But it's hard for me

[Bell sighs and drags the blankets around himself better. He's grumpy, and his nose is stuffy.] Youth...

Just because we tie you down doesn't mean everyone's a danger to themselves. I'm fine. [He opens a cabinet to get out teabags.]

Bell! Fine. If you wish to start dating a door I will not stand in your way. We will see how happy it makes you.

[He takes the teabags from Bell, putting them in mugs, before gently trying to turn Bell around and push him toward the bedroom.]

I am not a danger to myself, and you are not feeling good. I want you to feel better!

I don't date. Too much work.

[He frowns as he watches the teabags leave his hand and resists any attempts to maneuver him. His tired tone implies he's clearly not into the teasing as much as he normally would be.]

There are better ways to make me feel better...

We had dates!

[He can't budge Bell gently, and starts considering picking the other man up and slinging him over his shoulder.]

At least sit on the couch? I will make you tea. And anything else you need. I do not think the ways you want to be made to felt better are good ideas right now.

Too expensive. Genius was cheaper.

[D< oh no you don't! Bell doesn't want to be taken care of or fussed over. He leans against the counter, trying to mask a hopefully short bout of dizziness.]

Just make the tea. I really don't want to put up with this right now.

You got two dogs. For free.

[Seeing Bell lean, Youth gets more concerned. Bell is weak and he doesn't need to be standing.]

Put up with...

[For some reason Bell's being hurtful. But he is running a fever. Youth decides to ignore the mean and scoops up Bell with ease, tucking the blanket around his partner to make him both less able to fight and look more like a burrito.]

I am making tea. And you are going to rest. Bed or couch? It is your choice.

Still had to buy you.

Yeah. [He's tired, he's grouchy, he's sick, and he's spiteful. He doesn't want to be babied. Youth is supposed to be ridiculously out of commission, not him.]

[The world spins as Youth picks him up and it takes a while for Bell to reorient himself to understand why he's seeing spots and is in Youth's arms. The blankets impede his movement.]

Wherever. Bedroom. [The windows are easy enough to open.]

[The pen rests here, and then he's done writing. He'd thought Bell wanted to buy him.]

I... [Youth looks down, trying not to let Bell's attitude get to him. He's as gentle as possible as he carries Bell in. For a moment he considers his partner before tucking Bell in a little better, trying to impede movement. He knows how tempting it is to try to escape.]

I will have the tea ready in a moment.

[Before leaving the room, Youth feels Bell's forehead. It's still hot. He leaves the room and grabs a washcloth, running cool water over it before coming back in and placing it on Bell.]

If you stay still that will help.

[Youth is gentle, and, unhappy about this whole sick thing as Bell is, he has to appreciate that. His head is spinning less by the time he is placed on the bed. He wriggles a little as Youth tucks him in.]

Yeah, ok.

[Youth's hand is so nice and cool compared to Bell's own skin, and he misses the touch when it leaves. The washcloth is a welcome relief too, as much as he hates to admit it, though it only emphasizes how warm his skin is, and he shivers. ...Unfortunately, being a burrito means less arm movement, and his nose was running.]

...A tissue would be helpful.

[He sees the wriggling and wonders how long Bell will stay still. Probably not long. At Bell's statement Youth nods and grabs a tissue from the box on top of the dresser, carefully taking care of Bell's nose after removing the scarf. The kettle whistled and Youth nodded.]

Stay here. I will be right back.

[The water got poured, and Youth grabbed both mugs and their sugar container, bringing them in to the room quickly. He didn't know that Bell actually would stay put. Then he's untucking Bell just a bit, enough so that Bell's got his hands free if he wants them.]

Do you need to be supported? And can you hold the mug or would you like me to? I do not mind.

Mmmm.

[Bell considered wiggling off the bed and unrolling himself when Youth leaves, but doesn't quite manage to find the chance. His reflexes are sluggish, and it's taking more effort than usual to encourage his body to move. Bleeding would be more tolerable in comparison.]

[When Youth frees his hands, Bell takes the opportunity to slip them out. He narrows his eye at Youth.]

I am not a child. [The effectiveness of the statement is interrupted by the need to wipe his nose. Then he removed the washcloth from his forehead. It was beginning to feel warm and ineffective anyway.] I can hold a cup on my own. [He reaches out for the mug, even though his hand feels somewhat shaky and disconnected from his head and body.]

No. You are not a child. But you did not struggle when I picked you up, so you are weak. I do not want you to burn yourself or choke.

[Youth grabs pillows from the other bed to stack them behind Bell anyway. He knows how rough it can be to feel sick. Taking the cloth, he feels how hot it's gotten already. After giving Bell the mug, Youth gets up and leaves the room to hastily grab a bowl, put cold water in it and a couple of ice cubes, and return. He dunks the cloth in the chilly mix before sitting on the bed next to Bell and dabbing Bell's forehead. It might be annoying. But Bell was already not happy with him. He might as well try to make Bell feel less miserable no matter how annoying it was.]

What else can I do?

Just because I don't struggle, doesn't make me weak.

[He settles back against the pillows with his mug of tea, carefully sipping at it, though he doesn't take much. Even Bell is afraid he'll burn himself. It's too much work to try an escape, so Bell stays, and the icy water from the bowl Youth returns with makes him shiver. He bats away Youth's hand. His head feels clogged and hot and thinking is at a crawl.] Don't fuss over me.

[He sips the tea a little before giving up on it. The steam is clearing his nose, but the heat is becoming too much. He tugs open the burrito he's rolled in tries to sit up. Dizzy again...] I'll tell you what. I'll stay put, go to sleep...just let me go to the bathroom--then I'll go to bed.

You are sick.

[He looks down, a little discouraged, as Bell tries to keep his hand away.] I want to help you. You are important to me. And I will help you whether or not you let me, so it would be easier if you let me.

[Youth takes the nearly full mug from Bell, frowning at the fact that Bell had wanted the tea but now couldn't drink it. He nods and unwraps the blankets the rest of the way. Bell doesn't look entirely stable. And if he's offering to stay in bed, then he's probably realizing how bad off he is.] Lean on me. I will get you there.

[The mug goes off to the side, and Youth is standing, holding out an arm. If he has to carry Bell again he will without problem, but he doesn't want Bell more annoyed.]

So I've heard. [Sick, pervert...synonyms.]

[Bell only faintly hears the "you're important to me" speech as he casually waves off the words. Youth-speech. Tune in at the end and say "mmm" and it should suffice.]

[He looks at Youth, considering the offer and wishing he wasn't. It's not that there's anything wrong with Youth or the offer, and if Bell were feeling better, then leaning into Youth might have a certain appeal, but right now he would have to admit a weakness, a need to lean on Youth for something as simple as getting from point A to point B. ...He didn't want to have to lean on anyone, to be a burden--he didn't want to be something broken.]

[Then again, no one else is around to see. Youth...probably won't hold it over his head later, or discard him for it. They're...partners. He guesses he can give Youth the benefit of the doubt and see where it gets him. ...Bell can trust himself enough to put his trust in another. He stands, taking Youth's arm, and there's a buzzing in his head. The dizzy heat is back, and there are unpleasant dots over his vision. He grabs Youth's shoulder to steady himself, though he's not sure it'll work for long.] Try to carry me again, and I'll kill you.

Then you should listen to what you hear! [Completely missing the other angle.]

[He waits, seeing the consideration. This is one of those moments where he shouldn't push. While Youth can't figure out why it's such a hard decision to let him help Bell, he has to be patient. Maybe it's a similar struggle to his own desire to not look weak, but he can't remember it being that hard. If he gets sick again, badly sick, he won't be quite so independant. Probably.]

You would have to get stronger to kill me. [The threat stings, even if he takes into account Bell being grumpy because he's sick. Youth puts an arm around Bell, supporting him and trying to lead Bell to the bathroom. His partner's actually extremely hot, and Youth's starting to get worried.]

What about a bath? How does a cool bath sound? Since we are going that way already.

Edited 2010-07-29 18:53 (UTC)

Mm. Maybe. [Of course.]

[Maybe later he will fully appreciate the consideration and Youth's patience with him, but not now. Now he's too ill and beginning to realize it, to appreciate much of anything. He doesn't hate Youth, he's frustrated, with himself and his own body, and with the fact that he'll have to rely on Youth for something as simple as this is.]

I'd hope so. [He murmurs, not really sure what he's saying anymore. The arm steadies him, and leaning into Youth, Bell lets Youth lead him. There's a familiarity to this, even if he is reluctant to surrender this kind of control. If he doesn't fight it, it feels...almost ok.]

...Yeah. [He nods a little and stumbles into Youth.] ...that's good. ...put your hands all over me... [He's getting dizzier and Bell's afraid he's going to have to admit defeat. He can't fight this fever on his own, and when he gets to the bathroom, he leans on the counter, feeling weaker than ever.] ...Youth, it's really hot.

If I am saying it.

[One hand is wrapped around Bell's back, under his arms, the other is on his chest, helping to hold him up. Youth can feel how much Bell is relying on him, along with how much heat is radiating from his partner's body. This isn't good. He'll be patient while Bell is sick, and try to not let the comments get to him too much.] Much stronger.

Yes. My hands on you. You would like that. [It's much easier to make comments when he doesn't mean them in that way. He just wants Bell distracted in a good way instead of being upset or focused on feeling sick. If Bell is admitting he's hot, this is bad. Okay. Bathroom first, of course. Youth undoes Bell's pants and scoots them and the underwear down.] Here. Sit.

[After manuevering Bell he starts working at the rest of Bell's clothing: shirt, shoes, socks. Bell's skin is extremely warm. He shouldn't use water that's too cold, it might shock his system. Lukewarm, then. He keeps one hand on Bell's chest, supporting, as he reaches to start the water going and get the temperature correct.]

Bossy.

I would. On. In. [He's running on autopilot now, letting comments come out without thought, without meaning, focused on just trying to move and keep himself together. It's so hot, so exhausting. Bell sits as directed, shivering at the cool surface beneath him.]

...your hands feel amazing... [He coughs harshly before trying to reclaim a semi-normal breathing pattern. His body aches, and he doesn't help much when Youth pulls the clothing off him, but he doesn't resist either, even if he is tempted to remind Youth that he's not a child. It feels good to undress; the clothing was getting sweaty and restrictive...and now his nose is running. Bell searches for tissues and ends up just taking a wad of toilet paper to pinch his nose with.]

Everywhere. [Youth wishes he knew more of what he was doing. This seemed to be the right thing, but he's not certain. It didn't fall under the familiar feeling as the first aid classes had. Good, the temperature was right. He plugged the tub and redirected his attention back to Bell.]

[At the comment and cough Youth rubs Bell's chest gently.] Let me know when you are ready to get in. And then my hands will be on you more.

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